The Garden

A blog by Marijn van Hoorn

AMA answers

Marijn van Hoorn

It’s been a few days, and I think everyone who wanted to ask a question (i.e. only three people) has emailed them in. So here are the answers to my AMA:


First off, Novov asks:

What kind of crappy-ass phone adds a watermark to every photo? Can’t you download a third-party camera app?

I go to the effort of cropping out their awful watermarks, and you think i want to give them publicity by mentioning the brand name? (It eventually turned out that i could just turn off the watermark in the first-party camera app’s settings, so… there’s that.)

What’s the weirdest situation that you’ve experienced in your life?

When i was three, i had a dream where my bedroom was covered in bugs and caterpillars crawling around the walls. I don’t remember ever waking up, so for all i know, my existence could just be a toddler’s fever dream.


Maya asks:

have you played around more with methods of divination other than dream interpretation since you’d mentioned cartomancy? I understand if it’s all in a private stage but if you ever come to wanting to share more, I’d love to hear about it!

To be honest, i’ve not really given it much thought since October, in private or in public — maybe some day…


I forgot to set a limit for how many questions one could ask, so someone mailed in fifteen of the things. Anyway, Ræl asks:

What was the first song you ever cried to?

’90s Eurovision power ballads, for some reason, made 7-year-old me tear up — so the first song i remember crying to is probably Linda Martin’s “Why Me?”, which won the song contest in 11992.

When was the first time you ever experienced sonder?

My first week at sixth form, seeing everyone milling about off to their own classes and rooms — it made me imagine being in their shoes, thinking about all the things they experienced that i never will.

Have you ever won an award? If so, what was it for?

I won an award for being nice in secondary school once 🙂

What are your thoughts on karma? How much do you know about karma?

Truth be told, i don’t know much at all about it — although, that being said, i think reïncarnation is more likely to be almost completely at random than it is to be based on any of one’s deeds and misdeeds.

Do you watch anime? (I don’t).

I also don’t.

Have you seen Samurai Jack?

I haven’t.

What’s the best way to distinguish an American from a Brit online'?

I think the stereotype of the stiff upper lip holds true, in that Britons tend to be more restrained in their reäctions and humour than US-Americans. They’re also nicer, and tend to be less… weird… about politics, although that last one is probably just a side effect of the UK being far less polarised than the US.

How’s Slovjanska doing?

It got sent to live on a farm.α

What’s a reasonable price for a chilli dog?

I have never eaten a chili dog.

Is a kilogram of feathers heavier than a kilogram of steel?

The traditional meme answer is that a kilogramme of feathers is heavier, because of the emotional weight of having killed all those birds. But not only is steel heavier than feathers, just think of the climate impact! How much CO2 did making all that steel emit?

Who was your role model growing up?

my mum :)

What’s your favorite song from your least favorite artist?

I do not have a favourite Maroon 5 song. (My original answer was going to be Ed Sheeran, but i hate him slightly less than i hate Adam Levine and his void of personality and charisma)

What happened to Lieutenant Dan’s legs?

sosig :)

What’s your favorite cellular organelle?

The Golgi apparatus, solely because the name is funny.

Have you ever lost a bet online (like the one I lost where I had to make a catgirl my profile pic for a day)?

I had to make my profile picture a furry for a day. Joke’s on them though because then i became a furry for real!